Kitty poop roulette

so here's the deal.

my lovely kitties love to sit wherever they please, and we, the humble human servants of everything feline, allow them. one of their favorite seats: the kitchen table.  gross? maybe. but really, for us, it's no big deal. it's no, big, deal.. (sing it, katy perry: "It's No. Big. Deal. !!!) haha,ok,nevermind..

so i'm leaning over the table here this morning to check something on my computer...

...and all of a sudden i smell something REEEEEEEEEaallly BAAAAAD.  as in, uh-oh-time-to-clean-out-the-kitty-litter-box BAD.  so i dash to the other room, and to my horrified dismay and fear of what's coming next, i notice something awful:  the litter box is clean. unsoiled. no treats.  i'm afraid to answer the following question:  then WHY did i smell such a strong smell of poop?  i tiptoe back to the kitchen, and YUCK!!!! there on the souvenier placemat i'd gotten in puerto rico was a warm.

brown.

um, fragrant?

NUGGET!!!

gross! puke! yuck! get the disinfectant!!!!

so of course i become the biggest germophobe in the world, scrubbing that thing with lysol, but a lingering, disturbing thought festers in my brain: how can i ever eat off this thing again, knowing that my cat, you-know, "soiled" it???? 

so i do what any clever cunning mother would do, i clean up ALL the placemats, spin them around, mix them up on the table, and VOILA!!  Now NO ONE will ever know which one of these placemats had kitty-do on it.  sound fair? ha! and i'll be sure to tell everyone who sits at this table, that there's a 25% chance that you are eating off a placemat that was once pooped on.

yep. kitty poop roulette.

and if you're offended by all the poop humor i share from time to time, i'm sorry. (or not)

that's just how we do, do, do-do-do-do... (get it??? doo-doo??) ha!

lunch time!!!!!